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~ kate ~

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(no subject) [Apr. 6th, 2007|11:21 am]
~ kate ~
my sister is planning on going to FSU!!! im so proud of her. i wish i put more effort into where i went to college. shes going to have the time of her life down in florida. i want to move down there and restart college all over again haha.

i wish i hadnt chosen emmanuel. even though i did do really well and got to go to australia, i just sometimes feel like i missed out on something. i just hated emmanuel. i really did. i should have transferred after freshman year like i wanted to. oh well, i guess its good because im graduating in the top 20% of the management students and am getting an extra rope or whatever, so thats good. and who woulda thunk that kate sullivan would graduate with a 3.7. i mean, after all those dumb kate jokes, i actually did better than most people in the tritown, and can you believe it, FINISHED ON TIME. sooo screw you all who didnt think i could make it in the city. ha.

i just wish it was a warmer city lol. and more guys so i wouldnt be stuck living in the tritown with a psuedo crush on someone i dont even really like that much i just have nothing better to do with my time so i spend it on him. what a waste.

just gotta keep focused. i was planning on applying to meditech, but it sounds like KP continued up there so i dont think i will be. i guess we will see. i probably will because its close to home and i can save up some money. i dunno.

i kind of want to work for like 2 years, save up some money and then just travel, or do something, live somewhere far far away. australia. i miss it so bad. i just miss the people. i have turned into a masshole again. it sucks because i think this place is the greatest place to live again but really its not but i still can't seem to get myself to think that.

do you ever feel that you dont want to be where you are but you dont want to be anywhere else either?


IM STUCK.
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lyrics, and that is alll [Mar. 28th, 2007|09:41 pm]
~ kate ~
[Current Music |Camera Obscura "if looks could kill"]

Tell me where it all went wrong
Maybe I can make it better
Tell me where it all went wrong
Don’t you know that you really upset her
When you act like a man who is cross with every woman he’s never had
If it’s true looks could kill and you will be the first to make me mad
Then you’ll have to go

Is this the kind of fate you could contemplate
A breakdown at my very sight
I promise hidden words of tenderness in every single line that I write
Still you act like a man who is cross with every woman he’s never had
If it’s true looks could kill and you will be the first to make me mad
Then you’ll have to go
Maybe you’ll have to go

Is it true looks can kill
Is it true looks can kill
Is it true looks can kill
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FUCK THE PILL [Mar. 21st, 2007|02:43 pm]
~ kate ~
ok fuck birth control pills I HATE THEM

i feel like im always on or off them randomly. but this time im done.

all they do is make me feel ridiculously depressed and make me gain like 81743-928503985304982349082340923852310985324908723409823409823742310984230985345987315-94375-1983573-849723-984231-597234-83274983457430985732084732-7423487230985723 pounds.

and who likes a sad fat chick? NOT ME.

i still have like 2 weeks left, and im pretty sure you have to finish off the pack, and not just like randomly go off them...does anyone know?

cuz like i just want to start losing the weight that i gained since i've been on it. i have literally gained like 7 pounds. and since im already pretty effing chubby, that just pushed me over the edge to FAT.

eck. i wish you could have a body flat iron. like i flat iron my hair so its stick thin, can't i just do that to my arms legs and belly???
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(no subject) [Mar. 18th, 2007|11:27 am]
~ kate ~
i am in the middle of a quarter life crisis.
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(no subject) [Mar. 15th, 2007|07:52 am]
~ kate ~
HI LISA!!!! have a good day!!! :) haha
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(no subject) [Mar. 2nd, 2007|09:58 am]
~ kate ~
im on spring break. but i still have a busy week
i have monday and wednesday off. which is nice

but i still have to go to my internship tuesday and thursday, ugh.

friday night im working and saturday im working also

so ill just be chillin and do nothing other than internship.

i dont want to even see people from home. well just my friends and no one else.

i get so mad at people here. i really hate when i ask people to go out or hang out and EVERYONES reply is "well who else is going to be there" like what? are you too A-List to hang out with certain people? let me break the news to you people YOUR SUBURBANITE MIDDLE CLASS COLLEGE STUDENTS. you can hang out with anyone, all you have to talk about is the last fucking time you got wasted or how you dated me in 5th grade or whatever it is the hell people get drunk and talk about. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. im so fucking sick of people saying that to me.

literally someone immed me this morning and said "hey im home from school maybe we can hang out" then their next im was "if you can get a group of girls to come" FUCK YOU. its such an insult, like im not good enough to just hang out with you.

annoying. im thinking i will just stay in so i dont have to deal with crap like that.

well i have to get to cleaning my cave of a bedroom and then get ready for the gym so i can go straight after my eye appointment. joooy.
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(no subject) [Feb. 24th, 2007|09:53 am]
~ kate ~
i deserve better.

oh well.

i feel like shit. my throat is killing me. im cranky and tired and all i want to do is sleep. and my nose is stuffed up.

i've been focusing on entirely the wrong things this semester. i need to start working hard and getting my shit done and stop thinking about boys, im wasting so much time. i want to finish this year with a bang. 4.0. Its almost do-able, just strategic. Lets see how it goes!

i just need to focus
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(no subject) [Feb. 12th, 2007|09:06 pm]
~ kate ~
im a little sad. i thought maybe they'd be mad. im not even sure if they are. i've made out with someone new practically every weekend lately. i shouldnt be so attatched. i think im just ready for intimacy. im in dire need for it. and also to get the fuck out of my house. ugh.

watching heroes...
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(no subject) [Feb. 8th, 2007|07:36 am]
~ kate ~
i decided to cut my losses. i read thru my last blog and just reading it shows me i should not be with that person. deal with a little upsetness now, instead of a ton later. because we all know it wont end well.

...now the big question is, shall i ignore the person forever, or call and let him know my decision. i'll most likely call, i dont want to be a dick....

off to harpoon for the day, then back here to SLEEP.
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(no subject) [Feb. 7th, 2007|04:51 pm]
~ kate ~
guys are so silly. uugh. like i had no intentions of push push pushing. and i didnt. all i said was oh i am clinging i will talk to you later. and this causes a ruckus of events leading to me looking like this complete like psycho girl who wants a boyfriend. but i dont. i mean i could do it, i think. but i dont even want that how did this happen? like i've made out with a few people, gave my number out, and been talking on the phone/texting/emailing other guys since we started hanging out. theres no chance in hell that i've been sitting around waiiiting for this person but somehow it seems like i am. like hes a good kid but jesus.

so i read this book "who moved my cheese" and its about dealing with change. so you have to like sniff out change, react to it, and scurry along to find a new cheese. it says to change your behavior.

so i dont knwo what to do then. because normally i would like flip out and delete the person out ofmy life. he basically said "well if the chance arises for me to have sex with someone else...." you fill it in. so i mean, i dont know.

i think what i should do is be clear headed. im never clear headed. i have to accept what this person has told me. because its not going to change. and either deal with it, or let the kid go. i have accepted this reaction and dealt with it before in the past, and it always ends badly. i wonder what i should do then. accept it and change my actions compared to what i normally do by accepting this situation or just cut my losses and be done with it now.


guh i wasnt planning on thinking this thru but now i have to. my brain hurts.
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